The story of Zoe

This is... almost six months overdue, but it is very slow at work, the week before Christmas, and I don't have any motivation, so why not tell the story of Zoe.

My pregnancy with Zoe was much different than my pregnancy with Dominick. The insane amount of sickness being the main difference. Once I hit the six week mark, it was like my body said, yup, you're pregnant! Whammo! It got so bad I couldn't keep water down, so I went in to my doctor and they did an ultrasound to make sure everything was okay and to see if there were multiples. Obviously, there weren't. They gave me a prescription for Zofran, which is a drug they give cancer patients to help prevent nausea. It didn't do this for me. It just took the edge off of it. Two highlights of these weeks full of sickness: 1. Dominick hearing me wretch into the toilet so much he started to pretend to do it; 2. Throwing up in my car on my way to work. Luckily I had a plastic bag with me and I was right by mom's house, so I could turn around and get cleaned up.

The sickness began to pass around the holidays and I started to feel more like myself. Then we got hit with a double whammy: Brad lost his job and my doctor thought there might be something wrong with the baby, all in the same week. Actually, all in the same DAY. I will spare the details and say that these were several weeks full of anxiety, fear, and support from family. We ended up having an amniocentesis as this is the one test that is 100% accurate. The procedure was... uncomfortable and I never looked down to see the needle, I just kept my eyes on the ultrasound monitor and watched my daughter bounce around. Two more weeks of waiting and my doctor called me saying, NORMAL! EVERYTHING IS NORMAL! Sigh of relief doesn't cover it. But my mother's intuition was telling me the entire time that this baby is going to be fine. While Brad and I dealt with what happened with his job, the rest of the pregnancy progressed normally. I had some bouts in the hospital because of contractions, but nothing too severe.

July 2nd was my due date. It came and went and I was swollen, uncomfortable, and just wanting my baby to be here. Plus, I'm impatient. Patience might be virtue, but it's not one of mine. So we said, screw it, let's plan life like she isn't coming for a while. So we went to our friend's for July 4th, ate a lot, watched the fireworks, and went home around 11. I was starting to feel uncomfortable and figured it was from standing and being up and around so much. I just need to lay down, I thought.

So begins the roller coaster.

We get home and I felt a few contractions, but figured they would stop once I laid down. I think I closed my eyes a little after 11:30 while Brad was downstairs. I awoke at 1:30 a.m. to a very sharp pain. I woke up going, okay, here we go. I woke Brad up and said, start timing. So they started getting closer and harder, so we called my mom to come over and watch Dominick. I got up and started to pack the bag, get dressed, etc. Then some brainiac started lighting fireworks off in the street. It was 2 a.m. at this point, so Dominick wakes up and comes in our room. I'm sitting on the bed and going, what the, I just WENT to the bathroom. I go again and realize my water broke. Brad was on the phone waiting for the doctor, so she asked to talk to me and I told her what was happening and she said, okay! I'll get dressed and head in! My mom came and so Brad and I kissed Dominick good-bye (I cried), and we headed to the car. It hurt to sit down. A lot. So I put the seat all the way back and laid down all the way to the hospital. On the way there I had to tell Brad to go a little faster. Then to slow down so we didn't get pulled over. We get to the hospital and take the long journey up to the maternity ward. The hospital I delivered in has a Triage unit that you have to go into first, and then you are put into a birthing room. So I sign in and I'm getting... grouchy. It's only tolerable to stand up, so when the nurse tells me to lay down so she can put the monitor on my stomach, I said, NO, IT HURTS TOO MUCH. I manage to get on the bed and the on-duty doctor comes in. "Well, it's a good thing you got here when you did! You are 7 cm and 100% effaced!" My first thought is, Oh. Shit. No time for an epidural. The contractions are on top of each other now and get more intolerable. I'm having a hard time remembering how to breathe and practically breaking Brad's hand. I kept asking for an epidural and God bless the nurse, she was really trying to get an IV in my arm. I also told her to get me a basin because I threw up when I had my son. The contractions and coming, harder, faster, and lasting longer, and I'm moaning, groaning, and swearing. I'm trying to retain some sort of composure, but the nurse tells me to let it out. Then suddenly a wave of fear comes over me. I tell them I'm scared and the nurse and Brad get me to refocus and get through it. Then the feeling of going to puke came right as a contraction was ending, so I tell Brad and he is holding the basin while I'm puking, which was not pretty. So I'm on my side, heaving and puking, and it was like pushing. As soon as I stopped puking, I yelled, SHE'S COMING. IT BURNS. The nurse runs and gets the doctor and they both come in and say, she's crowning, we have to get her out of here. So monitors, tubes, wires, my IV, all come flying through the air and I'm literally trying to hold Zoe in. Meanwhile, still moaning and groaning I am being wheeled through the triage unit, Brad trying to hold my hand, the nurses trying to make it through the area and saying, "Where can we put her?! I think the OR is the closest!". We get into the hallway and the nurse tells Brad that he has to put on a gown and cap to go in. In the meantime they wheel me in and Zoe was RIGHT THERE. Brad comes in, walks up, grabs my hand, and just as the door to the OR was closing, Zoe came out. I think I pushed once. I leaned against Brad, looking down at our daughter, and kept saying, Holy shit. Holy. SHIT. Ten seconds later, my doctor walks in and says, "What the HELL is going on in here?!" I love my doctor so very much, she is so fun, yet cautious, thorough, and full of knowledge. We all probably shouldn't have been laughing as much as we were. I was on a natural high. I just gave birth with no pain medication and when they said what time it was, 3:30 a.m. on the dot, I realized it was only two hours. While my doctor started to do her work, Brad called all the parents and uncles and sent a text to our friends so they would see it in the morning. I was in the OR for about two hours before they were able to put me in a birthing room. We didn't care, Zoe was awake, alert, and nursing and Brad and I just kept talking.

Zoe Vera
July 5th, 2009, 3:30 a.m.
3 days late



The nurses were in and out, apologizing, etc. We really didn't care, the hard part was over!



Around 5:30 a.m. they finally had us set to go into a room, so away we went. The difference between giving birth with an epidural with Dominick and naturally with Zoe was obviously very different. Aside from the pain of the delivery, I could really feel the extreme cramping that happens after giving birth. I tried waiting as long as I could and then I really needed something for the pain, so I buzzed the nurse for my Motrin. She apologized as Triage got slammed so they were busy. I didn't care, Brad was trying to nap, Zoe was in my lap, and I was still in a state of, HOLY SHIT I JUST GAVE BIRTH. WITH NO DRUGS.

The grandparents were the first to arrive and unfortunately, because of the Swine Flu, no one under the age of 18 was allowed on the maternity floor. So that meant I couldn't see Dominick and this bothered me immensely. I was out of the hospital in a day and a half, so that was a huge help for me. Dominick was more excited to see this Zoe we have been talking about for so long and could've cared less about me. But he has been great since Zoe came home. Sure, he has had his moments, but he has gotten over them.



It was a whirlwind of a summer, but our family is now complete. The transition from one child to two was much more than I thought it would be, but we did it and now that we are both back to work, feel like we are finally in a routine. Now we are in the midst of our first holiday season as a family four and it is fun. Dominick fully grasps Christmas and Zoe is infatuated by all of the lights, and although this year was full of plenty of bad things, Zoe is what pulled us through and gave us all something to look forward to. I'm a sappy mom who loves her kids, what can I say. When she is older, I look forward to telling her about the year she was born and how much her presence (inside and out) helped everyone in our family.

Back from the dead

Okay, so not sure if anyone is even reading this anymore, but I am back from the dead and back at work. Therefore, I am functioning on a more normal level. I have many tales to tell; mainly about the ridiculous story of my labor and delivery with Miss Zoe (or ZoeZers as her brother calls her). It has been a crazy few months, but as we settle into a new routine and bring this horrid year of 2009 to a close, I vow to post regularly. Even if it's about... nothing.

Baby is here, long posts on the way

To say I have been behind on posting would be an understatement. But, adjusting to life with a newborn again, and adjusting to two kids instead of one, kind of eats up your time. So I will just say, for anyone reading out there, that Zoe Vera finally arrived on July 5th, 2009 at 3:30 a.m., weighing in at 8 pounds even and measuring 20 inches long. It was a fast labor and delivery. Very fast. Like, it was a total of two hours from first contraction to her coming out. But that story will follow. Very soon.

Due date

Today is my official due date, and here I am, sitting on the computer at home. I have been home for a week as I pretty much demanded being pulled out of work after having bad back pain and swollen ankles. Swollen doesn't exactly cover it, actually. More like elephantitus of the ankles and feet. It was so gross. But now that I can rest more, I can actually see my ankle bones.

We had a run of false labor on Friday, which sent us to the hospital, and back home again 2 1/2 hours later. To say I was sad and disappointed would be an understatement. I snapped at Brad the whole way home, because you know, it was all his fault. Haven't had anything like that since it happened, so at this point, who knows when this little girl is going to get here. Everyone would love for her to be a July 4th baby. It would be very cool, but, I would like her to come any minute now. But apparently, she just isn't ready. Even if she is full term now. So here I sit, and wait, and wait, and wait, and run out of things to do at home.

Being home with Brad and Dominick has been... interesting. A test of patience? A nice change? Depends on the day. I chock up my irritability to massive late pregnancy hormones. However it is nice to have time with just three of us before it becomes, the four of us.

We have had nonstop rain all week and man, are we tired of it. We can't do anything outside, so everyone is stuck inside. I have a feeling this summer isn't going to be much of a summer at all. We've had a handful of truly hot days so far and that's it. Ahhh, New York. You never know what each day is going to bring.

To pass our time, we have been making several trips to the library. We have gotten DVDs, videos for D, books for us, pretty much anything we can get our hands on. Brad and I watched the HBO miniseries, John Adams. It is quite fantastic and I recommend it to anyone. Following that, I am now reading My Dearest Friend: Letters of Abigail and John Adams, at the recommendation of my friend Laura. It's a great companion to the series and is actually quite interesting.

Hopefully the next post will include pictures of a pink bundle and be full of sleep deprived ramblings, but until then, have a happy and safe 4th!

Less than a month and counting

I am in the last month of my pregnancy and let me just say, it has felt like a very, very long haul. Starting out with the extreme sickness, the scares here and there, and now the discomfort, it feels like it's been about five years. BUT, here we are in the home stretch and we are ready for this little girl to make her arrival. Here I am at about 36 1/2 weeks:



I have put on more weight this time than I did with Dominick, but I already have my plan set on how to drop it (hopefully). This weekend we also put the finishing touches on the nursery. I am really excited with how it turned out.

From the hallway:





The "main" shot. I haven't set up the bedding yet as the two cats would get in the crib and sleep all over it and I don't want to wash everything for a second time. So I just hung it to give an idea of where the colors came from. The blanket on the left was the first thing we saw that we loved and the quilt is from the set we got. Yay Target!





And apparently I can't hold a camera straight to save my life, but here is the last shot:



We are really happy with how it all turned out. I bought almost all of the pictures on the walls through Etsy. A fantastic site with lots of great art. We bought these, this, this, and two other ones. It's a great site, I highly recommend it.

It is definitely spring time up here in NY and we've been lucky to not have too many heat waves. I say lucky just because I haven't had to deal with the ridiculous amount of swelling and sweating that I would have to endure come such heat wave. But it has been nice to just wear capris and flip flops, considering no other shoes fit. I have deemed my legs as either elephant legs, or overstuffed sausages and my toes as lil' smokies. Sitting all day at work does a number on my legs. It is all in the name of something great, and hopefully she will be here soon!

Pura Vida

The one word I keep using over and over to describe my trip to Costa Rica is AMAZING.  I have to keep pinching myself because I feel so damn lucky to have been able to go on this trip and stay at the most amazing place...for so cheap!  It's great to have great friends who, in turn, have great friends.  

I know vacationing in a place is different than actually living (and working) there, but I really feel that Costa Rica is a place I could live.  The southern Osa part, near Dominical.  I liked the atmosphere, the people, the beaches.  Oh my god, the beaches.  Like the one I pictured above and below.  Simply breathtaking. 

I spent the whole trip really never knowing what time it was.  I don't wear a wristwatch and my cell was turned off the whole trip (I had no service).  I simply woke up when the sun rose (around 5ish in the morning) and went to bed when I was tired (usually around 10pm by my best guess).  And what a pleasure it was to fall asleep to the sound of the ocean and wake up to the ocean and all the birds.  Had one bird who decided that he would be my personal alarm clock -- he liked to knock on my window every morning between 5 and 5:30am. And when I'd swing my body up out of bed to peer over at him, he'd cock his head at me like "Wake UP! You're in paradise, don't sleep the day away!" and fly off.   Now I'm not usually a morning person but I had no problems waking up so early.  Maybe the first time ever I ENJOYED waking up to greet the day.  I'd lay on the bed, peering through the screen door, across the balcony, and watch the ocean waves or the dozens of little silly birds that would flit from tree branch to tree branch.  When I felt ready, I'd walk down to the main dining area, have a cup of 100% Costa Rican coffee and sit some more, watching the landscape.  Very cool to be sipping coffee and watch a flock of macaws fly past.  

I traveled with 3 other derby girls.  It proved to be a winning combination - we all got along really well.  Sometimes traveling with other people can end up not being so fun but thankfully this wasn't the case.  Truly, it was a dream vacation.  And we hope to do it again soon...

Ultrasound

After a last minute stay in the hospital due to contractions on Tuesday, things seem to have righted themselves (for now) with this little one. My aunt is an ultrasound tech and offered to do a 3d/4d scan for us. Since I am in my 30th week, it was as good a time as any. And after such a chaotic week (hospital stay, then bed rest), I needed something good. So we went this morning and spent about an hour and got some really good shots of our little girl...

This is my favorite one. You can see her chubby little cheek and a nice profile of her:



Just a good shot of her face. I love her round little nose:



Her big brother was often seen with his hands next to his face. Looks like she following suit:





It was a good time and my aunt gave us plenty of copies. I am so excited to meet this little girl, but she has to stay in and cook for a bit longer. Being born 10 weeks early wouldn't be a great thing to happen! Hopefully this week will be the last of the scares before the big event!

OMG!!

I'm going to Costa Rica in about 6 weeks!! I am so excited!!

That is all.

Things and stuff

Well, considering I started off my last post all excited about Nine Inch Nails and Jane's Addiction touring and coming to our area, I'll start off by WHINING that they backed out of that date. They are now coming nowhere remotely close to us. Unless I feel like traveling to Toronto at 8 months pregnant, and let me say, given my undying love for NIN, that's not something I'm willing to do. And I'm pretty sure that Brad isn't going to allow that either. So, I will suffer the sadness of missing another awesome concert. I just hope they release a DVD or CD, since NIN will be going underground for a while after this. *sigh*

Spring has finally, kinda, arrived here in Rochester. I say spring and I mean that it is over 30. But seriously, it has been in the upper 40s/50s and that is like pure heaven for us. It has been a long, hard, cold winter but we managed to survive. We aren't out of the woods yet, but buds are popping up on trees and some flowers are starting to poke out of the ground, so we can see relief on the horizon.

This weekend Dominick turns 4 years old. I am completely boggled at this idea. Four years ago I was extremely uncomfortable, cranky, enormous, and miserable. And this time, well, I'm just uncomfortable and cranky. I haven't reached sheer misery yet or enormity. But I will hopefully get some pictures up and who knows, maybe even a shot of my 6 month belly, fully clothed of course. Time definitely does fly when the kid(s) arrive. Looking at the clothes we've gotten for this little girl so far, I sit back and realize she probably won't wear some of them at all, if not maybe once or twice. It's really nuts.

Brad is still on the search for a new job. If you aren't sure of how crappy our economy is, trying applying for a new job and try to keep track of how many callbacks you actually get. Or interviews. It's frustrating, but somehow we are making it.

But on the funner side of things, it's been a Bruce Campbell marathon in our house for the past week or so. We watched his latest, My Name is Bruce, and are going to start watching his short-lived series, The Adventures of Brisco County Jr. I am also extremely excited because one of my and Mary's favorite reality shows is coming back, Deadliest Catch. Yay for Tuesday nights again!

Early birthday present to me

Monday is my birthday. I am another year older in my early 30s and break into 32. With Dominick's birthday being at the end of the month, I have been consistently forgetting about my own birthday as I just focus on his. Now that I'm passed the 30 mark, birthdays aren't a big deal until, well, 40. Eek. But to celebrate this "occasion" I've taken Monday off and Brad and I are going to see Watchmen. We are very, very excited.

It has been a very, very rough few weeks in our household. We had a scare with the babe, but after an amniocentesis test, everything came back a-okay, so we will be having a healthy baby girl. Phew! Brad is currently looking for a new job, which has been... difficult, but we're confident he'll find something new. Because it's so easy to be unemployed in this shit economy right now.

In response to my last post, NIN did post some of their tour dates with Jane's Addiction and lo and behold, they are coming to Darien Lake on June 3rd! Yup, I am going to be 8 months pregnant at a concert. Maybe it will get things moving along. This is assuming things are still going normally and I'm not on bed rest for some reason. But, I am way, way psyched and checking daily for when tickets go on sale.

The weather up here has finally started to turn. Well, kind of. We had some frigid weather in the 20s earlier this week, but now we're having a heat wave and are in the 40s and 50s. Doesn't sound like much to most people, but after dealing with frigid temps for several months, it is a much welcome relief. Almost all of the snow has melted and everything looks brown and dirty, but dammit, it isn't white!

A dream come true

Anyone who knows me knows that Nine Inch Nails is my favorite band. Of all time. I have pretty much everything they've put out and have seen them live twice, once in Buffalo over 10 years ago and then a few years ago here in Rachacha. Well, on my daily visit to nin.com, Trent posted that he hung out with Jane's Addiction. The original Jane's Addiction. THE Jane's Addiction. In Trent's long post about getting together with them, his feelings for them, etc. he dropped the bomb that NIN will be putting on one more tour... with Jane's. I almost fell out of my chair. I love Jane's. Love. Them. This would be the concert of all concerts for me. I told my music buddy Jason that if they come REMOTELY close, we are TOTALLY buying tickets. I have no problem traveling or going to a concert preggo, that's for damn sure. So, now it's just a waiting game to see what the tour dates look like. Please, please, please let them come within driving distance.
Here's one of my favorite songs by Jane's from a very recent small gig they played:

Mountain Song

Bad Blogger

Ok ok, I know I haven't posted in quite some time. I guess sometimes I feel like I don't have anything worthy to say. Or just the opposite. I feel I have too much to say and get tired thinking about what I want to write before I even get started.

I haven't been up to too terribly much lately (at least, in my mind). I survived another round of cuts at work though is it really worth it because I now have even more responsibilities dumped on me and it's uber-frustrating. Fortunately, I'm addicted to Animal Crossing: City Folk for Wii and playing that makes me forget about the banalities of work...at least for a little while. If anyone else has ACCF and is online, let me know! I want to travel to someone else's town!

I'm trying to finish up the third book (The Amber Spyglass) of the His Dark Materials trilogy. I enjoyed the Golden Compass and thought The Subtle Knife was ok. I need to finish it quickly so I can get started on Johnathan Strange and Mr. Norrell. I've already had to renew the book once from the library and I haven't even cracked it open yet. (GASP! And I had to pay a late fee on top of it! I think that's the first time I've ever returned a book late!!!!)

And for anyone who likes graphic novels, I highly recommend The Walking Dead series. I usually dream about zombies after reading the newest trade. I also keep a jar of pickled eggs in the fridge as zombie survival food (the eggs would so last a long time without refrigeration)...JUST IN CASE!!!

Kicking off '09

Well we have survived the holidays and have started another year. Another year of changes, surprises, and who knows what else. I am in my 15th week of pregnancy and things have improved. I am still sick first thing in the morning, but that is it. I can eat normal food, I just have to eat slower and usually smaller meals. But I will take that any time over what I was dealing with for two straight months. Now that the nausea is passing, I can start to feel a bit more excited about this little stinker. I have lost 10 pounds due to the sickness, usually this is something to be happy about, but not so much when you have a little bean growing in your abdomen. I'm pretty sure that I'm doing a good job of putting the weight back on with countless meals of mac and cheese, bagels and cream cheese, and Ben and Jerry's ice cream. Hey, it all has calcium, right?

This time of year starts my movie geek time of year. As I tell my friend Laura, who is the main person I share this geekdom with, this is our SuperBowl. Award season for movies is a challenging, exciting, aggravating, and everything in between. Over the past couple of years, I have tried my hardest to see all of the pictures nominated. So far I have seen Rachel Getting Married (NOT that impressed with it) and today I have seen The Reader, which was really fantastic. I am waiting for the biggies to open up over the next couple of weeks in our area: The Wrestler and Revolutionary Road. I have heard wonderful things about Slumdog Millionaire, but I am not overly attracted to it, so we'll see. Another one I struggle with is Milk. Not because of the story, which looks extremely interesting, but because of my strong dislike of Sean Penn. Hopefully I can get over that to watch the movie. There are lots of favorites in each category, so we'll see what The Globes bring us tomorrow night. That will be a good telling of what the Oscars will hold. Considering I hold The Dark Knight as my #1 movie of 2008, I'm anxious to see if a comic book movie can make the cut for Best Picture. And I believe Heath to be above and beyond deserving of Best Supporting Actor wins as he did such a phenomenal job with ingratiating himself into The Joker. But I digress, and like I said, it's my big geek time of year.

January brings really cold weather and more snow. We are getting several inches of snow as I type and it is holding in the upper teens, lower 20s. I am officially sick of winter. Would it be possible to be snow birds in our 30s? If only we weren't so attached to our home town, I'd love to relocate, because winter has worn out it's charm for us. Dominick loves to be outside in the snow, as does Logan, so we'll suffer for the next few months and think ahead to the beautiful, green, warmer days of spring.